6th January 2003: Every year hundreds of thousands of people are 'getting money for nothing'. A young woman trips up as she walks to work and decides to file a lawsuit. She sues a) the company she works for, for making her come into work at 9am, during rush hour, meaning she had to take a bus and then walk the rest of the way to her office; b) the builder that lay down the kerb stone on the road slightly uneven so that she tripped over it as she rushed to get in on time and c) Gucci, for making shoes that didn't absorb the energy from an impact thus causing her to have a painful toe for the rest of the day. Miss Marcy won all three of these court cases on a 'no win no fee' basis. Thus, on top of her $150 000 a year salary, she was given $100 000 compensation, paid for by the 'offending parties'. Miss Marcy bought a new convertible with the money she gained, the builder (Paul Brusky) and his family of five, were evicted. On the other hand, millions of people every year are 'losing money', through adverts. Every day the average human being is bombarded with several large billboards and posters, an array of television ads, small adverts and page spreads within a magazine or newspaper and on occasion a radio advert with a corny jingle. All of these making the said individual spend money on things they don't want and don't need. The adverts prey on the needy, those that get easily jealous, those that need the new accessory, those that want to be better than everyone else - turning loving and caring people into greedy and envious rivals. Every year advertisers come up with more and more ideas to make the same people buy the same shoes but with a different logo, a higher heel and an inflated price tag. Adverts are corrupting the mind set of the developed world. This article has come about after NSN Executive Manager, Peter Nicolls, was conned into buying a new lamp shade from an attractive blonde. Exactly the same as a shade he had bought earlier and discarded simply because it didn't match the color of his lounge. The shop assistant, in conning him, made him feel small, like he had lost his supreme power and in return Peter filed a lawsuit, against 'Lampshade You Want' and their assistant who was recently fired as a result. Most people can safely say that an advert, usually something with a catchy slogan (i.e. 'You Can Do It'), has made them buy something they don't want. Wasting well earned money that could have been spent more productively, for example the payment of debts, bills, saving for a child's college education or even that new stove that is needed cause the old one blew up and took down the kitchen with it. But no. Nike made a forty two year old librarian buy a $200 basketball net, a pair of $60 sneakers and a basketball simply cause he thought he could do it and it would make him cool, fit and better than the other librarians. Sadly Nike forgot to mention, in order to play basketball you do need some form of hand-eye co-ordination. Several years later, in the back yard there is a rusty metal frame and in the kitchen there are still charred remains. Should we have to put up with this? should a man watching a football game have to watch an advert about Tampons during the interval? - he MIGHT buy it cause it looks vaguely like a sweet and could provide him with sugary goodness. The answer is no. And in combination of the 'getting money for nothing' and 'losing money' themes, NSN has developed a revolutionary idea called 'Get Your Lost Money Back for Free'. The idea - Sue. Sue those money grabbing bastards for all they're worth. Below are several terms you could use to gain a successful lawsuit: 1.
Claim you lost money through the purchase of something unnecessary and
go into detail about the results of this. And remember - No win no fee. So
remember. Its not 'We Want You', it's 'You must Sue'. |
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